by Nancy O.

The Penn State abuse scandal reminds us, once more, of the devastation that results when trust is broken and kept secret. We’re seeing vividly that when Truth is covered, darkness expands.

Thankfully, we’re also seeing that the power of Truth transcends both fame and shame. We long for Truth. Something deep within us cries out for it. Even if it takes years, decades, or lifetimes to come to light, when Truth surfaces, what follows our shock is relief.

As a person who experienced same-sex abuse by someone I trusted, I know that the resultant secret takes away emotional capacity. It separates us from ourselves and everyone else. We remain stuck between shock and woundedness. We build defenses, like calluses, that protect us from other potential abusers. These calluses also shield us from wonderful experiences with people who truly can be trusted–but we don’t trust. It’s too risky.

All lies separate people from themselves, which is the real tragedy.

So my blog today is not about sexual abuse. It’s about the abuse created by lies and the power of truth to heal.

I learned a long time ago that everyone has “stuff.” If you’re still lying about some of yours, set yourself free. Take a moment to write it out and then find a wise, trusted person–an empathetic, forgiving listener–to share it. Accept the healing that results.
Nancy Oelklaus teaches people to stop struggling and start living the lives they truly want to live.
www.HeadtoHeart.com -